Catatan Diatas Bukit
Saturday, May 29, 2004
i have read my past blogs, it is not that nice or beautiful. It is just full of crap of me falling head over heels or smitten over a younger lady..( midlife crisis ) anyway, after i was married, everything seem clearer ( mind you, i did not married the younger woman ) My wife now is a very good women, she accept me of who i am rather than the person that she wish i was. I am happy with my choice now. And this is not the story of the fox and the grape, in Aesop fables.
But at this juncture i wish to share something. The final words that cut the umbilical cord of feelings of me with yanie is a simple one. One good friday... few month back, as i walk back from the friday prayers, yanie was on my mind. In fact she was always on my mind every Friday, esp during friday prayers. So on that day, i called her and asked her one question. That question to me is very important, in the sense, where to place her in my life. Because, for me, if you love someone, so much...being together is not cumpulsory. The most important thing is that, that person must be in your heart and part of your life, far or near. True love in my opinion, will not be change by fate, with that i mean that, if it is fated for me to spend the rest of this life with another person, rather than the person that i love, so be it. But the person that i loved will never leave me or my heart. That person will stay there and my love will not withered and every chance that i have to attend to this person, i will do it with a willing and happy heart. So the only question that i ask on that fateful day was, do you Yanie still love me. Without any hesitation, she just said no. There is no pause, there no other way she repharse it. It was just a simple NO. I do not mind if she said, yeah i still love ya as a friend etc, but just a simple NO. From that day forth, i said to myself... the hell with you woman.
Now... i just lead my life, with my beautiful wife. and a busy life.
By the way, why i start writing again, just because i manage to create an access point on the other note, so. Right now, i am wireless. Never thought that doing this with out wire can be this much fun. But the most important thing is that, i manage to understand about WiFi. You should try it.
My wife is with her parents. They planned to go to Tasek kenyir for the Holiday. Hope they have fun.
Subjective things like beauty, love, feelings are those which we describe based on the path we have taken, that is why, there are so many intepertation of each things.. how we feel is actually in our hands, if this is true then beauty is what we wish it to be
But at this juncture i wish to share something. The final words that cut the umbilical cord of feelings of me with yanie is a simple one. One good friday... few month back, as i walk back from the friday prayers, yanie was on my mind. In fact she was always on my mind every Friday, esp during friday prayers. So on that day, i called her and asked her one question. That question to me is very important, in the sense, where to place her in my life. Because, for me, if you love someone, so much...being together is not cumpulsory. The most important thing is that, that person must be in your heart and part of your life, far or near. True love in my opinion, will not be change by fate, with that i mean that, if it is fated for me to spend the rest of this life with another person, rather than the person that i love, so be it. But the person that i loved will never leave me or my heart. That person will stay there and my love will not withered and every chance that i have to attend to this person, i will do it with a willing and happy heart. So the only question that i ask on that fateful day was, do you Yanie still love me. Without any hesitation, she just said no. There is no pause, there no other way she repharse it. It was just a simple NO. I do not mind if she said, yeah i still love ya as a friend etc, but just a simple NO. From that day forth, i said to myself... the hell with you woman.
Now... i just lead my life, with my beautiful wife. and a busy life.
By the way, why i start writing again, just because i manage to create an access point on the other note, so. Right now, i am wireless. Never thought that doing this with out wire can be this much fun. But the most important thing is that, i manage to understand about WiFi. You should try it.
My wife is with her parents. They planned to go to Tasek kenyir for the Holiday. Hope they have fun.
Subjective things like beauty, love, feelings are those which we describe based on the path we have taken, that is why, there are so many intepertation of each things.. how we feel is actually in our hands, if this is true then beauty is what we wish it to be
